
‘The Reds to beat the Tahs this weekend! Oh mumsy’
Friday’s Rugby Information.
‘Hear ye, hear ye, by royal decree Friday’s Rugby Information particular ‘Coronation Version’ hath arrived & from now till perpetuity, to be heralded throughout the Commonwealth because the greatest G&GR Friday Rugby Information on this planet.
Welcome commoners, peasants & basic rugby riff-raff to Friday’s Rugby Information. In per week with a lot occurring I can barely sustain. ‘Star Wars Day’ yesterday, King Chuck’s anointment tomorrow and sufficient rugby information to maintain even Prince ‘Randy Andy’ in any other case preoccupied.
Right this moment let’s put our focus squarely on the conflict of the season to this point, the Blue Bloods of NSW v the Communist agitators up north, the Queensland Folks’s Republic of Queensland (QPRQ) Reds, in ‘What he mentioned’. Take a deep dive into the battle inside the battle in ‘The King & I’. Preview the video games that don’t actually matter in SRP Spherical #11 in ‘Who Actually Cares?’. Take an in depth have a look at Lex Marinos departure in ‘Let slip the canines at Roar’. Have a look at this weekend’s SRW Ultimate in ‘Surprise Girls’. And place the crown atop right this moment’s providing with Friday’s Goss with Hoss, quickly to be confirmed an honorary member of the Privy Council.

WHAT HE SAID.
Inventory the fridge and restring the banjo, for this weekend nothing else issues because the Blue Bloods of NSW head deep into banjo territory of Townsville, for over 50 years placing the ‘F’ into ‘FNQ’. It’s the QPRQ Communistas v NSW Waratahs.
With the Reds sixth on the ladder on 19 factors and the Tahs seventh on 17 factors and with 4 different sides additionally in contact with a finals spot, the actual motion on the SRP ladder (right here) is from positions #5 to #8, with any variety of permutations to unfold earlier than our eyes over coming weeks. Win this recreation and also you’re largely accountable for your individual future. Lose and also you’re on the mercy of different outcomes and in a really precarious place.
It’s honest to say that each beginning entrance rows are missing some regulars to long run harm and possibly cancel one another out. Each side are with out their largish and common bovine starters, Nella The Abattoir Tupou & Angus The Bull Bell. The again 5 are each properly served with dimension and talent and work ethic. To that finish it surprises me that there isn’t extra acclaim and better honours for Liam Wright, the man is each inch a rugby participant. Does his work properly each match, real lineout abilities, good within the tight, excellent chief and as Nutta mentioned final week, very ‘Fardyesque’. I do know he’s had accidents, however he wouldn’t be misplaced on the airplane in September.
Respective #9s, Joe Dust & The Commissioner are possible auditioning for the third halfback gig on the RWC behind The Lip & Lonergan. Win this battle and begin practising your French I’d reckon.
At #10 the clock is ticking for Ben Donaldson whose kind has been MIA all season. Facets of his yr at #10 have been, as my three ex wives would say, ‘extraordinarily underwhelming’, or as present Mrs Hoss would possibly say, ‘is that it’? His solely saving grace this week is that he’s up in opposition to an inexperienced #10 in Creighton.
JOC’s guile and rugby mind will likely be wanted to assist spark the broader channels, however Josh ‘No’ Flook is a participant on the rise and Jordan of Nazareth has been elegant & understated this yr. Vunivalu, whereas improved, seems as flaky as outdated lead paint and search for him to be exploited by Perese & Foketi with Pietsch to have a subject day on his left wing.
So, for all of that, simply the place is that this recreation gained or misplaced? Simples. I reckon the Tahs bench is stronger they usually edge the Reds as a collective throughout the #4 – #8 jumpers. The battle of Gleeson v Wilson will likely be enthralling too. Simply on that entrance Soiled Harry must play out of his pores and skin. With Eddie Jones choosing others forward of him the sphere simply bought much more aggressive with Isi Naisarani making his return this week for the Farce. Soiled Harry should make an announcement as he’s possible slipped behind Sideshow Bob Valetini & Gleeson for the #8 jumper.
Fearless Prediction: Shut for a lot of the sport, then Tahs to kick away. Tahs by 13
REDS (1-15): Sef Fa’agase, Matt Faessler, Zane Nonggorr, Connor Vest, Ryan Smith, Liam Wright (co-c), Fraser McReight, Harry Wilson, Tate McDermott (c), Lawson Creighton, Jock Campbell, James O’Connor, Josh Flook, Suliasi Vunivalu, Jordan Petaia
RESERVES: Richie Asiata, George Blake, Peni Ravai, Angus Blyth, Seru Uru, Kalani Thomas, Tom Lynagh, Filipo Daugunu
WARATAHS (1-15): Te Tera Faulkner, Dave Porecki, Harry Johnson-Holmes, Jed Holloway, Hugh Sinclair, Taleni Seu, Michael Hooper, Langi Gleeson, Jake Gordon (c), Ben Donaldson, Dylan Pietsch, Lalakai Foketi, Izaia Perese, Mark Nawaqanitawase, Max Jorgensen
RESERVES: Mahe Vailanu, Nephi Leatigaga, Daniel Botha, Will Harris, Charlie Gamble, Harrison Goddard, Joey Walton, Harry Wilson
Referee: Angus Gardner

THE KING & I.
Now the extra astute amongst you’ll be aware there’s an apparent ‘face to face’ not listed above, one ‘Deborah Kerr’ (as Roy & HG as soon as known as Alfie Langer) or Fraser McReight and His Royal Rugby Majesty ‘King’ Michael Hooper.
Historical past is affected by tales of younger usurpers, with restricted credentials, attempting to overthrow a lot beloved leaders. Assume Richard III and the ‘Princes within the Tower’, Rudd-Gillard-Rudd and Rocky’s I-V. However let’s be sincere, most finish in brutal, blood-soaked defeat, and so it will likely be for Deborah Kerr this weekend within the recreation inside the recreation in opposition to King Michael.
Deborah is just not with out his skills. Match, large engine, fast, good hyperlink participant and good for a number of turnovers every recreation. However other than that, simply what does he provide? Precisely, ‘nothing’. And apart from, he’s up in opposition to in all probability one of the best #7 to ever play the sport in Oz. So good in reality, that the member for Fyshwick, Senator Dave, needed to shift to Wallaby #8 to accommodate King Michael’s undoubted skillset. Moreover, no one reads the sport higher than his Royal Sevenness, no one is fitter, no one works more durable on and off the ball and for all that Deborah presents, King Michael does too, however with expertise and management as a cherry on high.
There’s a lot to search for this weekend throughout this conflict and the sport will activate one or two pivotal moments and I can inform you now, the architect of those moments won’t be Deborah Kerr, however His Royal Tahness, King Michael, first of his title, chief of males, participant of legend, greatest #7 of our time and victor on the FNQ subject of battle. Et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.

WHO REALLY CARES?
It’s spherical #11 of SRP once more & crystal ball time. Let’s have a look at who wins & why. All groups, instances & protection courtesy rugby.com.au supremo Mr N Williamson.
Friday 5 Could 5:05 pm AEST – Highlanders v Chiefs at Forsyth Barr Stadium, ad-free, on Stan Sport
Final week the Chiefs beat the Crusaders for the second time this season, yep twice they’ve pantsed the south island Lords in a single yr. They’re unbeaten for the season and I can’t see the Highlanders troubling them for this one.
Fearless Prediction: Chiefs by 21.
Saturday 6 Could 12:05 pm AEST – Fijian Drua v Hurricanes at HCF Financial institution Stadium, on Stan Sport
Drua are at residence once more with forecasts of 138% humidity for this Saturday. Will off subject FRU distractions affect the Drua? Will the gang raise them sufficient to beat an excellent Canes facet?
Fearless Prediction: Drua by 3 simply to bother KARL
Saturday 6 Could 2:35 pm AEST – Crusaders v Western Drive at Orange Idea Stadium, on Stan Sport
Crusaders had been properly crushed final week in a really fuzical incounter wuth thu Chuffs and have a number of gamers out/rested for this one and I’d love to choose the Farce. However, the Farce nonetheless don’t know who their #10 is, Dr Robbo is out they usually simply don’t have the firepower to get one over the Saders.
Fearless Prediction: Saders by loads
Saturday 6 Could 5:05 pm AEST – Blues v Moana Pasifika at Eden Park, on Stan Sport.
Blues by heaps.
Fearless prediction: See above
Sunday 7 Could 2:35 pm AEST – Melbourne Rebels v ACT Brumbies at AAMI Park, on Stan Sport
What a implausible technique to farewell the weekend with a Sunday afternoon fixture. Boy, the Ponies facet seems practically worldwide energy. They’re settled, largely harm free and may rightfully really feel stiffed final week in opposition to the Canes, the place there have been two clear & apparent ‘non calls’ that result in two Canes tries. To their credit score, the Ponies haven’t mentioned a phrase about them and simply bought again to work. The ACT pack might go toe-to-toe with most worldwide packs. Their backs are properly drilled, harmful, but composed and have tempo to burn and the return of Steve Larkham has seen the Ponies take it up a notch, to the purpose they’re as pleasing to look at as the nice Brumbies sides of the early 2000s and that’s no imply feat.
For The Scum, they’re much improved this yr and aren’t with out their very own threats. However mono a mono the Ponies have them greater than coated.
Fearless Prediction: Brumbies by 17.

WONDER WOMEN.
Reds v Fijiana Drua, Saturday Could 06th LIVE on Stan Sport and 9Gem, with protection ranging from 4:30 pm (AEST).
Group particulars courtesy rugby.com.au
Nicely after a barely predictable common season, the semi-finals of SRW produced one giant upset, primarily based on earlier kind, with the Fijiana Drua beating the Tahs women 20-17 and this after the Tahs had lead 17-0 at one stage and dropped the ball twice over the Drua’s strive line. Goes to indicate how harmful the Drua could be. All season they regarded disjointed and uninterested, however when their recreation ‘clicks’ it positive as shite ‘clicks’.
The Queensland group additionally had a better run factor then predicted beating the Brumbies 23-20 to safe their spot within the remaining. The feminine communists had been constantly sturdy this yr, narrowly lacking out in opposition to the Tahs throughout common season and have improved constantly to deserve a spot within the remaining.
Nice to see this recreation performed in Townsville earlier than the Reds v Tahs SRP match and right here’s hoping for a superb crowd and a few good footy.
Fearless Prediction: Kind and the pinnacle says ‘Crimson’, but when thoise Fijians discover their groove, look out. Ahhh, bugger it, gotta let the Reds win at the very least one up north. Reds by 9 in a excessive scoring affair.

LET SLIP THE DOGS OF ROAR?
Now I don’t normally enterprise over to that different rugby website, name it lack of time, or just actually only a complete lack of curiosity. As soon as upon a time, a few years in the past, I attempted to comply with it. Among the perception and articles had been terrific and from confirmed and sensible journos with huge expertise and rugby ‘IP’, however the ‘feedback’ part was largely for the dwelling useless, it was drab & gladiatorial and total simply not my cuppa whisky and I’ve by no means returned, till this week that’s.
Monday’s G&GR equal of ‘we really feel sorry for him, so have a gig with us’, Charlie, posted on craparazzi again channels, a hyperlink to an ‘A’ grade hatchet job on the then, simply resigned GM of RA, Andy ‘Lex’ Marinos and the article ‘didn’t miss’ and it bought me pondering one quite simple query: why?
Why go after somebody alongside the strains of: ‘consigned as an irrelevant sidenote within the historical past books of RA‘? What’s to be gained? That triggered a reminiscence of Chuckles posting the same craparazzi hyperlink to an nearly equivalent public disembowelment of former Orange Coach, Doug Renton a number of months again on that very same platform. Now as I acknowledged on the time, I did & nonetheless do agree with RA transferring on DR. It was justified, brutal, however justified and timing & alternative warranted actions with haste. However the keep it up from throughout the ethernet was equally excessive & spiteful.
One of many points ‘reported’ or maybe extra aptly, the ‘character assassinations’ round Lex was his reticence to totally embrace the ‘Lust for Loigies’ emanating out of RA. However riddle me this, shouldn’t each proposed $1.6m funding in a single participant, a league participant at that, be examined intently for worth, for price profit evaluation and for potential return on funding (ROI)? What in regards to the legislation of unintended penalties, in as a lot as say, one among our current rugby stars is up for contract negotiation within the subsequent yr or two? What do you say to him at negotiation time after they search a ‘bump’ commensurate with the $1.6m? Make no mistake, Gaggers, cash ain’t simply cash, it’s additionally about ‘ego’, it’s a way of self-worth, a way of recognition, of being needed and it’s additionally about respect. In a single fell swoop RA has created rugby inflationary pressures that will make the grim reaper himself, Philip Lowe, blush. However I digress.
It’s clear to me that RA flip to the identical journo & platform after they’re trying to management the narrative. The tales are practically to script: ‘no actual loss, overrated anyway’. ‘Didn’t actually ship, went OK, however we’re higher off with out them & we want them properly’, which is de facto company communicate for ‘couldn’t care much less’ and speaks to a churlishness you get from a drained toddler mid ‘tanty’.
I don’t know Lex, by no means met, by no means will. However any senior supervisor who may help lead an organisation of that dimension from a monetary precipice, that just about noticed the code go beneath, to an $8m revenue through the uneven waters of COVID, helped re-jig the SR comp to SRP, noticed extra funding to the ladies’s recreation, noticed a big sponsor be part of long run and assist convey each males’s & ladies’s RWCs to our shores didn’t do a half-bad job did they! Was he excellent as a senior govt? Most likely not, only a few of us are, however is the sport in Ouncesbetter for his time and enter during the last 3-4 years………..
Folks come, folks go, folks strive, folks succeed, folks fail. Absolutely at the least they’re entitled to stroll away with their dignity intact with out snide character dispersions seemingly intentionally leaked in opposition to them?
Only a thought.

FRIDAY’S GOSS WITH HOSS.
Hammer throw.
SMH experiences on The Hammer contemplating a tilt at a possie on World Rugby, reporting:
Nonetheless mid-campaign in a turbulent overhaul of the sport in Australia, McLennan confirmed he was additionally contemplating a run on the place of vice chairman of World Rugby, the sport’s international governing physique.
Hemorrhoid needed?
The drums proceed to beat that RA are eager to make a play for the NRL’s Payne ‘within the’ Haas to swap codes on the finish of 2024 with rugbypass.com claiming a suggestion of $1.6m per yr for 3 years being bandied about. What should Valetini & Gleeson be pondering – hey one yr contracts???
The Lip journeys west?
Whispers nonetheless persist that one Nic ‘The Lip’ White could also be headed west. Good for all Ouncesrugby I reckon. Extra recreation time for Lonergan on the Brumbies and WA get a top quality #9 to steer them across the paddock & to mentor their lot. Plus, it doesn’t get mentioned sufficient, however The Lip’s kind has been elegant this yr. Head and shoulders one of the best antipodean #9 week in, week out.
Now if they may solely discover a #10.
Draft? Higher shut the window.
Blissful touched on this yesterday. Me, I’ve waxed on about it for years. SRP wants a ‘draft’, it wants to pick out gamers for nationwide sides who play wherever throughout SRP and it wants it yesterday. Paul Cully of stuff.co.nz has extra.
Tremendous Cooper returns from torn pooper?
In a narrative that may heat the cockles of those that love actually outdated males & comeback tales, the SMH experiences Australia’s Johnny Sexton, Quade Cooper, is prone to return from harm in a few weeks to provide our skinny #10 shares a well timed enhance. Will it’s sufficient? Will he be match & discover kind? Or will his walker get caught and he fall and break a hip? Let’s hope he returns for any probability we have now in any respect within the Parisian Pageant of the Gilbert rests on these rickety outdated bones.
Till subsequent week. God Save The Tahs & all hail King Michael
Hoss out.